I would highly recommend you buy anything on TV that you see endorsed by anyone sporting a mustache.  To that end, I just called up Farmers’ Insurance, and in a mustache induced fit of spontaneity, ordered car insurance, life insurance, pet insurance, house insurance, and hand insurance (we’re not like those face and body models- we have minds of our own).

In retrospect, these purchases don’t make much sense, as I don’t have a car, a house, a pet, and quite possibly, a life.  Damn you Farmers’ and your persuasive use of a mustachioed spokesperson!