Not like an actual stache, because that might be itchy. That’s not to say, of course, that you shouldn’t cuddle up next to a guy with a bigote on his upper lip.  You should.  Mustached men need more love.  It’s science.

Anyway, we here at Stachist often get emails about stache products, and the pillow to the left is a perfect example of that.  It, and other mustache delights, can be purchased at the Musatche Marvel store.

So go ahead, get the pillow and give your head a rest. It’s been getting fatigued under the weight of your mustache.

Do you forget to buy Christmas gifts on time? No? Stop lying, we know you forget that sort of thing all the time. Dude, Don’t get mad, we’re just trying to help! What? She said she’d leave you if you forgot again?

WELL! You can win back her love and confidence with a timeless classic – a Christmas ornament. And you can make someone else’s holiday dreams come true by buying it homemade from Etsy. We personally love one with a classic look like this:

Now you can have a stache for your wrist.   Slapstaches combine the radical design of a mustache with the awesome functionality of a slap bracelet.  Pretend it is still the 1990s and get your own Slapstache here:  http://www.indiegogo.com/slapstache

Prices start at just $5, and there are several attractive package options if one just isn’t enough.

Today marks the midpoint of the month where millions globally let their stache patch run free in an effort to raise money and awareness for prostate and testicular cancer initiatives. Formally known as Movember, the organization behind the global movement has raised essentially $300 million dollars for prostate and testicular cancer initiatives and awareness. Some will raise money for the cause and others will spread awareness through the best conversation starter in the room: an awkward, ill-formed, mid-growth mustache. Some will undoubtedly grow out some behemoths able to best some of the greatest, but on the whole, men around the world are going to have scraggly, light-brown, sporadic upper hairs growing above their mouths.

For those brave enough to sport the stache, the world salutes you. You are a man among boys. A true hero. But, at times, this road will not be easy. Some will try to tear you down. Ladies may often question whether the scraggly hairs growing on your face are really your best look. Those ladies are not worth your time. Stop speaking with them immediately. Their negativity serves no purpose except to distract from their inability to grow their own stache patch. Bosses at work may discuss company dress code with you as a means to avert your enthusiasm for the cause. Those bosses are cowards and greeds. You aren’t growing this stache for fame or power or an attempt to mount a systematic corporate overthrow. Nay, you are growing this stache for men around the world.

The most important thing to keep in mind as elderly ladies gawk at you and mothers shy their children away is that you are a mustache-growing, altruistic, American hero, and no one can take that away from you. So, when you’re leaving a party womanless or crying into your pink slip, stay strong. We support you because you support men everywhere. Your network is growing, and coincidentally, so are those beautiful hairs on your upper lip.

To support Movember or raise money for your own team, check out theselleckstache.com, the purveyors of the most iconic mustache in modern memory. 20% of the proceeds go to support Movember, and if you have your own team, you can sign up to get your own link and get the money donated towards your own team.

Live Strong! Live Movember!

Mike

There are various shops where you can go to get your mustache related merchandise. Some are here, some are over there. Wouldn’t it be great if you could buy your mustache coffee cup, mustache undies, and all of your other mustache goods in one place?* Now you can at MustacheAttack.com.

Just in time for Christmas they have generously offered Stachist readers 15% discount! Use code STACHIST15 at checkout to get your discount.

Merry Christmas! They also sell the festive card below.

* Not sure if they actually carry undies, but give ‘em some time.

Well, Christmastime is here again, and it’s time to get a gift for that special stache-loving lady in your life. And Kay Jewelers has one thing right- you should get her some oh so special jewelry from your heart to hers.

But I speak not of diamonds! Oh no, your lady deserves the best money can buy!

And what’s the best, you ask?
Well certainly you must know– I mean a stache!

(I myself gave these earrings to a very beautiful lady myself last christmas, and solidly give them whatever furry seal of approval I, as a Stachist writer and general moustache enthusiast, can offer.)

People always wonder why I started a blog about mustaches. Was it for the fame? The money? The women?

It was for all of the above. …and for the schwag. See, bloggers of a certain fame are propositioned to review products, which, most of the time, they are given for free. It just so happens that I was propositioned by the makers of the Mustache Poet line of Magnetic Poetry. A fine product indeed! Let me tell you about it.

The set contains over 200 manly words like “groovy,” “power,” “party,” “intrigue,” and “freedom.” And, because they are magnetic, you can put them on any metal surface and they will just stay there! Put them in your locker, on your fridge, your file cabinet or your toolbox. It would make for a great stocking stuffer!

If you are looking for more mustache related gear, check out other mustache merchandise.

Check out my poem after the jump! Read the rest of this entry »

Erica, to the left, has taken a whole new direction with her scarf.  It has a stache, and when wrapped around her neck and face, it hangs out in a perfect position.  Women can finally have the stache that they know they want.

The scarves are 70% organic cotton and 30% hemp, and can be purchased at Erica’s Etsy page here:  http://www.etsy.com/listing/66722305/mustache-scarf.

Get yours today!

As if you don’t have enough accessories on your face! Want to take the 1800s look even further? Grab yourself the Coronel Monocle from Warby Parker ($50). Warby Parker is a new low-cost but designer online eyewear retailer. They cut out the middle man and offer a superb purchasing experience by sending you samples in the mail so you can try them on for real. If you’re going to wear them everyday, you want to make sure you look alright, yeah? I recently bought a pair of the green Becketts. Now all I need is a fake plastic nose and I’ll look like Groucho Marx.

Read more about the Warby Parker story.

Moustache Wax is very important for the attempting of elaborate moustaches. Its quality is very important for the quality of that elaborate moustache.

I have tried many waxes. All of them failed miserably. That is, until I was gifted a tin of Man’s Face Stuff.

The kind gentlemen who produce this product sell it in 4 wonderful scents. Gin & Tonic, a tantalizing fragrance true to its name. Huntsman, a black licorice aroma every bit as masculine as its name. Red Hot, a cinnamon which has, unrelated to its name, had women tell me it conjures fond memories of christmas time. And last but not least, the specialty scent All Nighter, made to add a dash of coffee and tobacco to round of the similar aroma its ideal wearers most likely already sport.

Bottom line: Need moustache wax? Buy this stuff. Its the only moustache wax with the lumber-jack-like grip that has managed to keep the curls in my moustache all day long, even if I go swimming.